


A Not Shit-Ass Creepypasta Fanfiction

by politicalturtle



Category: Creepypasta - Fandom, Marble Hornets
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-04-14 04:41:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14128293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/politicalturtle/pseuds/politicalturtle
Summary: If you want something done, I guess you have to do it yourself.I am tired of reading shitty creepypasta stories, with mediocre writing and boring plot lines.One too many times I've stumbled onto a fic where "Masky" and "Hoodie" are in relationship, but its very shallow and focused almost entirely sex or "but what if he hates me for being gay and liking him??????" One too many times I've stumbled onto a creepypasta story where Masky and Hoodie's pasts are entirely discarded. They're also skinny teenagers, for some reason. Let them be old you cowards.Lucky for those us who actually enjoy marble hornets and creepypasta crossovers, your Friendly Neighborhood Bluestar is here to give you quality. Well, I'll try, at least. Please enjoy my hard work and shameful fall back into the creepypasta/marble hornets fandoms.*DISCLAIMER: I have not been involved in the creepypasta fandom for nearly 5 years, and I have not been involved in the MH fandom for 2 years. I've done a lot of research preparing for this story, but please correct me if I make a mistake.





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> I am political-turtle on wattpad and am copying/pasting the story here.

**MAJOR SPOILER WARNING FOR MARBLE HORNETS. IF YOU PLAN ON WATCHING THE SERIES, DO NOT READ. 

Unless you're fine with spoilers, then proceed. Don't say I didn't warn you, though. 

However, this will be a Creepypasta/Marble Hornets mashup. There are a few changes in MH canon to make this story work, but I try not to change anything big. 

The ages in this book will be consistent with the ages of the character's stories (ex: Tim/Brian are in their late 20's, JTK is in his late teens, Toby is 17, etc...) 

This book will be focused on Tim and Brian (Masky and Hoodie). They are in a relationship in this book. 

Anyway, now that the introduction is done, put your hands together! You all have been personally selected to witness this once-in-a-lifetime, breathtaking, bomb-ass event. Live, and in person! Right here! Right now! Without further ado, here is the moment you've all been waiting for! This is: 

A Not-Shit-Ass Creepypasta Fanfiction.


	2. Entry 1

Brian woke with a start, pain shooting up his crooked spine. He gasped and ground his teeth in pain, balling his fists. He pushed himself up, his arms shaking with the effort. His back popped and cracked grotesquely as he hobbled to the bathroom.

He stumbled into the dimly-lit room and held himself up with the counter. He stared long and hard at his reflection in the mirror. His light brown hair was a mess, sticking out wildly. His lack of sleep recently was starting to show, with dull eyes and dark circles. Brian sighed and reached for his bottle of painkillers. He poured two pills from the bottle and swallowed them, washing them down with water from an old water bottle next to the sink. 

He stared at his shirtless reflection for a long time. His body was bent awkwardly to the left, like someone had hooked his midsection and pulled it over. He stared at his harsh appearance sadly. He'd kill to be a broke, jobless, twenty-four year old college student again. He could sleep back then. He turned his attention to the door when he heard the bed creak. A moment later, his very sleepy boyfriend walked in. 

"Uh-oh," Brian quipped, pawing at the other man's sideburns when he walked by, "everybody make room for Elvis."

Tim smiled at him, slapping his hand away playfully. "What are you up for?" His voice was still hoarse from sleeping. 

"My back hurt. Why are you up?"

"I just missed you, I guess." Tim ran a hand up Brian's back lightly. "Did you take your meds?" 

"Just before you woke up, yeah." 

Tim hummed and continued rubbing Brian's back, running his fingers lightly over the bumps along his spine. "Are you sick again?" 

"Maybe a little." 

"Need help getting back to bed?" Tim ducked his head slightly to face Brian, who was still slumped over the sink. 

"If you would." 

Tim looped Brian's arm over his shoulder slowly, gently straightening the other man's back out best he could. Brian whined and bit his cheek at the sharp pain that shot through his body. 

"Are you okay?" 

"Fine. It just hurts. It'll go away in a minute." Brian answered through clenched teeth. 

Tim frowned, and they continued their slow journey back to the bed. Tim helped Brian situate himself on his stomach before climbing into bed next to him. Brian scooted closer, tangling his leg with Tim's and snuggling up to his side. "Maybe you could ask your boss to get me surgery." Brian suggested, only half serious. "It'd help both of us a lot." 

"Yeah, right." Tim snorted. "I'm not letting that thing anywhere near you. Motherfucker almost took you from me once. It's not laying a hand, or whatever the hell it has, on you. Not when I'm here." 

The hyper-aggressive statements were formed as jokes, but Brian knew better. Tim's hand was placed over Brian's hip protectively, and his hand was trembling. 

"Tim." 

Tim looked down at Brian, locking eyes with him.

"Nothing bad is gonna happen anymore." Brian promised, a look of sensitivity softening his features. "That's all behind us. We can relax." 

"Last time I relaxed, half of my friends ended up dying." He replied bitterly. 

"They were my friends, too, Tim." 

"You didn't get them killed." 

Brian frowned. "Tim-"

"Don't." He interuppted. "Its fine. Forget it. Does your back still hurt?" 

"No." Brian lowered his head back to Tim's chest. "I'm fine." 

The two laid in silence for several minutes before Tim spoke again. 

"Do you think it ever gets easier?"

"I don't know."

Tim bit his lip, and Brian kissed his shoulder softly. 

"It will get better. We just gotta look out for each other. We can do it together."

Tim didn't look convinced. 

"That's how its always been, right? You and me against the world. Always." 

Tim sighed, and ran his fingertips down Brian's deformed back. 

"Always."


	3. Entry 2

_The hooded man hit the ground with a sickening crack. Tim huffed and ran down the stairs, turning to the corrider where the man was laying on the ground. Tim ran over and dropped to the cold floor, raiding the man's pockets for his medication and the small video tape. Electricity crackled in the air as pain split through Tim's head. He turned to the heaving man angrily, and yanked up the mask._

"What do you want for breakfast?" 

Tim stared at Brian for a moment. He was leaning on the counter with a spatula in hand, staring at Tim expectantly. A plastic brace was wrapped around his body, straightening his posture slightly. 

"Tim?" He asked again.

"Pancakes are fine." 

Brian nodded and swiftly turned back to the stovetop. "So what's up?" 

"Waiting for breakfast."

"What were you thinking about?" 

Tim shook his head, and mumbled, "I'll tell you about it later." 

Brian looked morosely outside to the darkening sky. "Do you have to work tonight?" 

"Well, we don't live here for free." 

"Can't you take a day off?"

"I'll only be gone for a day, tops." 

"But I get so bored when you're gone!" Brian pouted. "There's nothing to do here." 

"What do you usually do when I'm gone?"

Brian fought a light-hearted smile as he answered, "Wait for you to come back."

Tim smiled and shook his head. "I'll be back before you know it. It's an easy job." 

"You should let me come with you."

"Fuck no. It's way too dangerous, especially for you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" 

"It means you're not going. It's way too risky and requires a quick escape. I'm not letting you get hurt."

"Well, if it's so dangerous, maybe I don't want you to go. What makes you think I don't care about your safety?" 

"I never said you didn't care." Tim answered shortly. "But you're not going." 

Brian walked to where Tim was sitting. He dropped down into the chair next to him and pushed his breakfast in front of him. "What job do you have to do?" 

"There's some news reporter who's trying to find us, or something, and I have to go take care of it. I really don't ask questions." Tim answered as he started eating.

"I'll stay out of the way if you let me go. I'll just tag along. Keep you company." 

"Brian, I'm responsible for your safety and I'm not putting you in a dangerous situation." 

"Hey! I'm a grown man! I can watch myself."

"You'll have to sit in a car for 4 hours and I really don't think that's good on your back." 

Brian crossed his arms. "It's not much better than laying in bed all day. Besides, you'll get lonely in a car all alone."

"I won't be alone. Someone else is going with me." 

"Are they as fun as me?"

"It doesn't have to be fun, Brian; it's work."

Brian frowned and dropped his shoulders. He spoke softly. "Tim, I haven't been outside in two years. I haven't left these woods in five. I wanna go see the world, and I wanna see it with you." 

Tim stared at Brian seriously for a minute. "I'll let you go, but I don't think the boss is gonna be happy with it." 

Brian lit up and pulled Tim into a hug. "Have I told you that I love you recently? I should say it more. I love you." 

Tim hid his face in Brian's shoulder. "I love you too." He mumbled.


	4. Entry 3

Brian couldn't sit still for the entire four-hour car ride. He bounced in his seat and couldn't keep his eyes off of the night sky. He'd occasionally smack Tim in the arm with the command "babe, look!" and point with child-like excitement at the mundane view of something completely ordinary to anybody else. 

Tim's other company, a shy teenager by the name of Toby, sat in the backseat watching silently; was fascinated by the interaction between the two and the complete mood change of his colleague. Tim was usually short-tempered and set on solemnity. Yet here he was, laughing and beaming at the rowdy man beside him. 

"Tim, look!" Brian gasped, pressing a finger aggressively against the window. "Can we go?" 

"Sorry, Brian. I've got a job to do." 

"Please? I haven't been to a restaurant in years and we still have the entire night to get there and back." 

"No. It's-" 

"Too dangerous." Brian finished the sentence, disheartened. "Right." 

Tim thought for a moment. "If I can get the job done fast enough, we'll get fast food or something on the way back. Deal?" 

Brian nodded and grabbed Tim's hand. "Deal." 

"It shouldn't take too long. I'll be in and out." 

"Then food?" 

"Then food." 

They pulled up in front of a dusty old motel, and Tim turned off the car. He retrieved two masks from under his seat and leaned back against the cold leather.

"Put this on." Tim handed Brian a black cloth mask. Brian stared at the sickeningly familiar mask for several moments. 

"Why?" he asked, voice shaking. 

"To make sure no one sees you." 

"But I'm staying in the car." Brian protested, raising his voice marginally. "Why do I need to wear this? Why did you keep it?" 

Tim hushed him and pulled him into a hug. "I promise I'll explain more on the way back. Please, just put it on. It'll only be for a couple minutes."

Brian pulled away and stared at Tim seriously. His lip quivered slightly. He looked back down and ran a thumb over the red stitches. Slowly, he nodded. "Okay. I trust you." 

He shakily pulled the mask over his head. He'd forgotten how hard it was to breathe wearing it. He turned back to Tim. The other man had already pulled his own mask on, startling Brian slightly. He hadn't seen the white, expressionless face in years. He didn't miss it. 

"I'll be back out as soon as i can." Tim told him, his voice muffled. 

"Stay safe." Brian turned away from him. 

Tim gently pulled Brian around to face him. He pushed his mask up and gently rolled Brian's above his nose. He then leaned forward and kissed Brian softly, a light blush spreading over his cheeks. 

Brian froze, momentarily shocked. Tim wasn't exactly a fan of physical affection, let alone pda. He held Brian's face in his hands as he pulled away.

"Thank you," he whispered. He pulled down his mask and got out of the car, leaving Brian alone.


	5. Entry 4

The hour-long wait dragged on for what felt like months. Brian felt like he was suffocating under the black cotton, and his memories were plagued with the events of his past. Nothing is more terrifying than running for your life from the person you love, unable to keep them from harming you. 

Nothing.

What Tim's job consisted of was completely foreign to Brian. He was always too afraid to ask. Every other person working under the Operator seemed to be a deranged murderer. Brian could only hope Tim's job was different. 

"You goddamned idiot." Brian cursed to himself. "He told you not to come." 

The door opening startling Brian slightly, and he turned to greet his boyfriend. Though, the sight made him falter, horror stealing his words.

Tim's pale yellow jacket, as well as his mask, had drops of blood them. His companion, who was bouncing excitedly in the backseat, looked even worse. Tim slammed on the gas, and started driving back the way they had came. 

After putting some distance between them and the hotel, Tim relaxed, breathing out a sigh and pulling the mask from his face. Brian followed, tearing the fabric from his body and throwing it on the floor. 

"Wh-what the fuck?" He demanded, his voice shaking much more than he'd like it to. "What the fuck did you do to that woman?" 

Tim glanced at him apologetically. "I did my job."

"That's your job? You've been killing people this entire fucking time?" Brian began crying. 

Guilt sank deep in Tim's stomach. "Im sorry, Brian, I just-" 

"No. Just- pull over." 

"Brian, I-" 

"No! Seriously, Tim, pull over. I can't be be here with you right now." 

Tim frowned, and turned sharply into the parking lot of a park. One other car was there, at the far end of the lot, but it seemed to be deserted. As soon as the car was stopped, Brian unbuckled and left the car, slamming the door behind him. 

Tim slumped back in the seat, watching Brian pace a few feet from the forest entrance. Tim breathed out heavily.

"Fuck." He finally growled, putting his head in his hands. "God-fucking-dammit." 

"I'm sure he'll be okay in a few minutes." Toby told him softly. "He just needs some time." 

"Right." Tim opened the car door. "I'm gonna go talk to him. Wait here." 

Brian turned on Tim angrily as soon as he stepped out of the car. "How could you do that to people? After all we've been through? Why didn't you just tell me?" 

"I know, I know. I didn't have any other choice. There's nothing I can do about it now." 

"Yes, you can!" Brian stepped forward, and grabbed Tim's hands. "We can. We can just leave. We can go, and go, and keep going, and never look back. Hell, we can even take the kid, Tim! Think about it!" 

Tim shook his head. "Brian that thing would find us and kill us before we even crossed state lines and you know that." 

Brian stared at him, silently pleading with him to run. 

Tim frowned. "No. I can't. Let's just get back into the car and go home." 

Brian tore himself away from Tim. "No! I'm not going back to that- that prison! Look at what it makes you do! I can't just sit back knowing that this is going on." 

"We have to go." Tim held his hand out to Brian. "Please? Can we just go home?"

"I'm not moving." 

"I'm not gonna just leave you here." 

"Fine! Then we're staying right here." Brian sat himself down on the ground to prove his point. 

Tim huffed in frustration. "This is childish." 

"At least it isn't murder." 

"God dammit, Brian! I'm very sorry I didn't tell you about it, but what else is there to do? Just get up so we can go the fuck home and we don't have to sleep in a car overnight." 

Brian seemed taken aback by Tim's outburst. He looked at the ground. "At least tell me why you do it; why we ended up here." 

Tim sat on the ground across from Brian. "It's a long story." 

Brian breathed out a sigh and looked back up at Tim. "We've got time."


	6. Entry 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long chapter

_The hooded man hit the ground with a sickening crack. Tim huffed and ran down the stairs, turning to the corrider where the man was laying on the ground. Tim ran over and dropped to the cold floor, raiding the man's pockets for his medication and the small video tape. Electricity crackled in the air as pain split through Tim's head. He turned to the heaving man angrily, and yanked up the mask._

_The man's face was twisted in pain, and he gasped when the mask was finally removed. His breaths came out labored and uneven. Tim stared at his friend for a long time, his chest tightening._

_"Brian?" He whimpered._

_Brian's response was a stuttered huff, his gloved fingers grazing Tim's hand slightly. Tim stared at his dying friend, completely numb._

_"Brian?" He asked again, voice cracking slightly. "Oh my god, Brian!"_

_Brian reached out for him weakly, and Tim held his hand._

_"Come on, man, get up." Tim pleaded, tears beginning to leak from his eyes. "Please, Brian, you're all I've got."_

_Tim tried to gently pull his friend to his feet, but his body was limp._

_"Please!" He cried. "Please, Brian, you're all I have! I can't lose you! Don't you dare die on me!"_

_Tim received no response._

_"God dammit, Brian, I love you! Get up!"_

_Electricity sparked the air._

_"Brian, come on! We have to get out of here! Please!"_

_Brian tightened his grip around Tim's hand, pulling it towards him. Tim leaned down towards Brian. The words Brian breathed out were almost completely inaudible._

_"-love you."_

_Brian fell still, his hold on Tim's hand loosening. Tim pulled Brian up, hugging his body._

_"Im sorry." He sobbed. "I'm so sorry."_

_His ears were ringing. The static in the air intensified by the second. Tim could sense the figure in front of him, but didn't look up._

_"Please, you can't take him." Desperation washed over Tim. "I'll do anything. Bring him back to me, please. Don't take him from me."_

_His mind grew hazy, his vision blurred, and he passed out._

_Someone grabbing his jacket cut through the fog in his mind, and he realized he was walking. It was dark outside, and he was surrounded by trees._

_"Tim."_

_He looked down to the soft voice. Brian was cradled in his arms, staring up at him._

"I blacked out before I could do anything, though. Then we ended up at the mansion, and I fell asleep pretty soon after that." Tim stared at Brian as he finished, waiting for a response.

"Oh." Brian gulped. "I-I didn't know all of that." 

"You don't remember?" 

"I remember you telling me you loved me. Then I remember waking up in a weird house, and you were asleep next to me. My back hurt." Brian shook his head. "I dont remember anything in between." 

"You said you loved me before you died." Tim sniffed. "I couldn't just leave you there." 

"I didn't know that. I know I loved you, though. I still do." 

"You don't have to." Tim looked down at his hands. "If you want to leave me, you can. I understand."

"Please, Tim, I wouldn't stay if I wasn't the happiest I've ever been." 

Brian awkwardly pushed himself back to his feet, and held a hand out for Tim.

"Do you mean that?" Tim pulled himself up, lacing his fingers with Brian's momentarily.

"Of course I do." Brian pulled Tim into a tight hug. "I mean, yeah, everything's all fucked up, but I have you. And that's all that really matters to me." 

A car door slamming made the two of them jump, and Brian looked over Tim's shoulder to a very angry-looking man headed their way. Something was familiar about him, but Brian couldn't quite place it. 

Tim turned around, placing himself in front of Brian protectively. He stiffened when he saw the man. 

"You!" The man shouted at Tim. "You motherfucker! You left me to fucking die!" 

Tim was at a loss for words. 

"What? Are you just gonna stare at me?" 

"Y-you're alive?"

A dry, unamused laugh exploded from the man. "Thought you killed me off for good, huh?" 

"Jay, I really didn't know-"

"Yeah, right." Jay interrupted. "I'm sure you didn't know. Real sure. You never know anything." 

"I'm really sorry. I am." 

"You're sorry? That's it? All you have to say is sorry? I've been living in my car having nightmares every night for the past five fucking years and you're sorry?" 

"I-" Tim was cut off by a hard punch in the jaw.

Jay raised his hand again, but Brian stepped around Tim. 

"Woah, dude, what the fuck was that for? He's trying to apologize to you." 

Jay looked at Brian up and down, lingering on the brace wrapped around his body. "He got you, too, huh?" 

"This was an accident. Tim didn't mean to hurt anyone." 

"Oh come on, Brian!" Jay laughed again. "How can you defend him? Look at yourself! He fucking destroys everything he touches!"

"He saved my life." 

"So, what? Do you work for him now, or something?" 

Brian hesitated. "That's not really any of your business." 

Tim grabbed Brian's arm lightly, one hand still holding his jaw. "Let's just go home." He slurred. 

"So you're leaving me again, Tim?" Jay asked. 

"Everything that happened really messed all of us up." Tim turned. "I'd be pissed off too. But It's over now, okay? It happened, and I regret it every day. I'm sorry." 

Brian held Tim's hand, which shook slightly. Brian pulled Tim behind him as he started towards the car. 

"I really am sorry, Jay." Tim called back. "I hope you can forgive me one day." 

Jay shook his head. "You are fucked up, Wright. You're fucking mental." 

Brian pushed Tim into the car before he could hear more, and went around to take his seat. Brian slammed the door shut and buckled himself in.

"Alright, babe." Brian sighed. "Food? I'm starving." 

Tim cast a sad glance in Jay's direction before starting the car. "Yeah. Food sounds good."


	7. Entry 6

Brian reached out and gently touched Tim's mouth, causing him to flinch. 

"Stop it, Brian. It hurts." The man slurred. "I'm not gonna die because I've got a busted lip." 

Brian slumped back down in his seat, looking out the window. "Where are we going, anyway?" 

"Whatever cheap fast food place your heart desires." Tim smiled at him. "You don't even have to order off the dollar menu." 

Brian laughed, turning to grin at Tim. "Really? You mean it?" 

"No." Tim shook his head after a moment of thought. "I don't think we're _there_ yet." 

Brian huffed and crossed his arms playfully, unable to keep the smile off his face. This is what he missed about the days before Marble Hornets. He and Tim could drive around and talk for hours, joking and debating over whatever was relevent at the time. There were no constant threats, just the day-to-day stress of college and doctor appointments. 

_But this is good, too._ Brian thought. He uncrossed his arms and laid a hand gently on Tim's. Tim immediately laced their fingers together, and happiness bubbled deep in Brian's stomach. _God knows I never would have confessed if things had stayed the same._

"How does pizza sound?" Brian asked. "I think there's an old pizza place around here. It's really dark in there, so we should be fine."

"Yeah, it's about a mile down the road from here. We'll get there in no time." 

"Are you good with pizza?" Brian twisted to address the teen in the backseat. 

Toby looked a little shocked. "Uh, yeah. Pizza's fine." 

"Good," Tim stated as they pulled into a parking lot. "'Cause we're here." 

The restaurant was just as dark as Brian had predicted. Three dull lamps lit the whole restaurant, and Brian chose a booth in the back, almost pitch-black corner. Luckily for them, it seemed nobody else was making a 3am pizza stop. They were completely alone, other than the very tired-looking cashier.

"Okay, me and you need to talk." Brian sat directly across from Tim, leaving Toby in the corner. 

"Are you still mad about the whole job thing?"

"I'm not thrilled about it," Brian admitted. "But I'll just have to deal with it. We need to talk about something else." 

Brian turned Toby. He pulled a twenty-dollar bill from his pocket and handed it to the teen. "Go nuts, kid. I don't care what you get, as long as it's pizza, but if i see a single pineapple, I'll make Tim leave you here." 

Toby timidly took the money. "O-okay." 

"I'm serious about the pineapple, man." 

"Right. I-I got it." 

Brian flashed a smile at him. "Good. Take your time." 

Toby nodded and slid under the table nervously, making his way back up to the front counter. 

"So what's up?" Brian asked, leaning forward onto the table.

"What do you mean?" 

"Well, you usually don't like physical affection, but you've been all over me this entire trip." Brian smiled cheekily at him. "You even kissed me. In front of another person! Is something wrong?" 

Tim looked down at his hands. "Can we talk about this later? It's not anything bad but I need time to," he hesitated, "think about what I'm gonna say." 

Brian offered him a soft smile to calm him. "Tell me whenever you're ready. I'll listen."

Toby returned with the pizza and the trio ate in silence. The rest of dinner was uneventful, and they exited the restaurant with no trouble. 

"Tim, look!" Brian was breathless, his gaze fixed on the starry night sky. The moon shown brightly, giving his face a soft glow and reflected in his wide eyes. "Can we please stay for a bit?" 

Tim nodded, and helped Brian climb on the hood of the car before joining him. The two locked hands and Brian leaned against Tim's shoulder. 

"God, it's so pretty, isn't it?" 

Tim felt the weight of Brian's hand in his own, his body against his, and his head against his shoulder. A comforting aura of warmth and love radiated from Brian, giving a sense of serenity for Tim. 

"Yeah," Tim sighed. "It really is."


	8. Entry 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! Author has been very tired and very busy lately.

The drive back to the mansion was quiet. A sad air surrounded the trio; none of them wanted to go back. Brian was especially reluctant.

He tapped a finger anxiously against the back of Tim's hand, his head resting against the window. He looked longingly, _sadly_ , at the scenery as they passed. He missed the sense of adventure he had when he was younger. He'd always been a homebody, sure, but he only enjoyed being able to cling on to something warm, something familiar.

Staying at the mansion was familiar, but the house was far from warm. He'd found a friend in the girl staying in the next room over, but the warmth only came when Tim was around. He'd walk the ends of the earth with Tim if asked, and would honestly rather do that than stay in a dusty mansion under the rule of a demonic tyrant. Brian let a sigh escape him, and leaned back against the seat, closing his eyes and attempting to get comfortable. 

He was stirred a few hours later by the feeling of being picked up. An arm looped under his legs, and another carefully around his torso. He leaned against the chest of the man carrying him, listening to his heartbeat as he was carried back to their room. 

Tim laid him gently on the bed, slightly startled when Brian kicked his shoes off. 

"Have you been awake this whole time?" 

"I wanted to be carried." 

Tim shook his head, a small smile playing at his lips, "Lazy-ass." 

Brian smiled at him, pulling his hoodie off and pushing himself into a comfortable position. Tim joined him soon after, sitting across from him on the bed.

"Did you figure out what to say yet?" Brian asked. 

Tim nodded, twiddling his thumbs nervously. "I think so." 

"Then tell me." 

"You know next week makes five years that we've been together," Tim started, eyes fixed on the bed.  
"I know you like all that lovey-dovey stuff and I felt bad that I hadn't been giving it to you. You deserve it."  
Tim smiled, almost sadly. "I mean, you practically glow when you look at me. You look _happy_ to be with me. Nobody's ever looked at me like that before. 

I just get so nervous because I've never done this. I've never been in a relationship before. I'm so used to fucking up everything else in my life, but I can't lose this." Tim looked up at Brian, who was listening intently. "You make me so much happier than I deserve to be, and I want to be the loving partner you've always wanted." 

Brian scooted closer, and held onto his boyfriend's hands tightly. "I think you're a lot sweeter than you give yourself credit for, but please don't change for me. I don't want a perfect boyfriend."  
Brian leaned forward to kiss Tim's cheek. "I just want you. If all the touchy-stuff makes you uncomfortable, you don't have to do it. I understand." 

The man shrugged. "I think it's starting to grow on me." 

Brian smiled. "I'm really glad we talked, but I've _got_ to get some sleep." 

Tim agreed, and the two settled in for the night. 

\- 

Tim woke with a start, drenched in sweat. 

"Brian! Brian!" He cried, grasping at the alarmed man. 

"Hey, hey, what is it? What's the matter?" Brian was awake in an instant, pushing himself up painfully fast to comfort his lover. 

"I-I didn't know! I didn't know it was you! I didn't! And you- I didn't know!" Tim's eyes were wide.

Brian cupped Tim's face with both of his hands to steady him, "Look at me. Tim, look at me." He pressed their foreheads together, staring into Tim's eyes. "Look at me, I'm right here. I'm okay. We're okay, alright? I'm right here. I'm fine. Look!" 

Tim shook his head slightly, but Brian didnt budge. "Tim, look at me. I'm right here. I'm real, I'm alive, I'm okay. You can hear me, right? Can you hear me?" 

"I-I didn't-"

"Can you hear me?" Brian repeated, his voice forceful. 

Brian loosened his grip enough to let Tim nod. "Good. You can see me, right? I'm right here. You can feel me touching you, right?"

Tim nodded again, taking in a shaky breath.

"I'm right here, babe. I'm okay. I'm not going anywhere. I'm safe. I'm right here with you; We're safe."

"You're okay," Tim breathed, not breaking eye contact. 

"I'm okay," Brian affirmed. 

Tim nodded, and Brian pulled him into a hug. He rubbed Tim's back lightly, feeling another sob shake his boyfriend's body. "I'm okay, honey, I'm fine," Brian soothed. "Everyone's safe." 

Tim sniffed and pulled away, rubbing his eyes. "-Sorry. I'm sorry."

"Don't be." Brian wiped a tear from Tim's cheek with his thumb, and smiled softly at him. "Are you okay to talk about it? Do you want to?" 

Tim hesitated. 

"It's fine if you don't," Brian reminded.

"You died. I pushed you and you died." 

"You didn't know it was me. I don't hold it against you." 

"I just wanted my medicine," Tim's voice cracked. "My head hurt so bad." 

Brian shushed him softly, pulling him into another hug. "It's okay. Just go back to sleep. I'm right here; nothing's gonna happen." 

Brian held Tim's hand, intertwining their fingers as they settled back down. Brian rubbed his thumb over the back of Tim's hand comfortingly. He mumbled calming words and reassurances to him as he did so, snuggling up to his side. 

"Everything'll be fine," Brian whispered, a plan starting to develop in his mind. "We'll be fine."


	9. Entry 8

Brian did not sleep. He layed his head on Tim's chest, listening to his heartbeat, feeling the rise and fall of it, and stared at the wall for the remainder of the day. He let his mind wander, not realizing night had come back around until Tim ran a hand through his hair softly. 

"Good morning," he hummed, stretching best he could with Brian on top of him. 

Brian leaned into the touch, slowly pulling his gaze from the wall. "Sleep well? The second time, anyway."

Tim smiled at him, "Yeah, thanks to you." 

Brian smiled to himself and pushed himself so he was sitting across from Tim. Tim followed him, leaning forward and kissing him. Brian was taken aback by the intensity. Tim was usually timid and gentle, but his entire demeanor was different. The kiss was rough and aggressive.

Brian tensed for a moment before letting himself relax. Tim used the opportunity to slowly push him back onto the bed. Brian wrapped his arms around Tim's shoulders, eventually letting Tim pin his hands above his head. 

"Hmph- stop," Brian leaned out of the kiss, panting slightly.

Tim pulled away immediately, "Are you okay? I didn't hurt you, did I? Is your back okay?" 

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Just- what are you doing?"

Tim avoided Brian's eyes, blood rushing to his cheeks. "O-oh. I just- well I mean we've- five years is a long time and-" 

Brian laughed, cutting off his boyfriend's rambling, "You are such a child. If you want to fuck, just tell me. You don't need an excuse." 

Tim laughed to himself, before dropping the smile and shaking his head. "It's not that... I have another job tonight. It's supposed to be kind of-..." Tim hesitated- " _risky._ I just wanted tonight to be kind of special in case I-" 

"No." Brian pushed himself so he was sitting.

"Huh?" 

Brian stared at Tim, confusion and anger written across his face. "No. You're not going to take this huge step in our relationship so you can go fuck around and die on me. You're not gonna die at all." 

"I-" 

"Tim if you want to take this step then I want it to be because you really, really want to- not because you feel like you owe me this; not because you think it would lessen the grief of- of losing you." Brian jabbed a finger at Tim's chest. "That's seriously fucked up, Tim." 

"Brian, I-" 

"I mean really, what are you thinking?" Brian had started to shake. "Did you even think about what would happen if I lost you? Especially after that? You are all I have. Jane is good company, sure, but you? Tim nobody in the world could ever even come close to where you are. You are the most important person in my life; the most important person I've ever known. 

"Call me selfish all you want, but it needs to be said. You need to hear it. It hurts me that you can't see yourself how I see you, Tim. You are the only person I care about. The only person I've _ever_ cared about this much. Fuck everybody else. Amy, Alex, Jay, Seth, everybody! It was never them, it's always been us, y'know? Me and you against the world." Brian's voice drifted off, and he looked away from Tim. "Always." 

Brian looked back up, staring at Tim seriously, "I can't lose you, Tim. You have to be careful." 

"I can't just deny jobs that I'm given, Brian. I don't get a choice." Tim grabbed Brian's hand. "I promise I'll be careful, for you." 

Brian smiled and leaned forward, resting his forehead on Tim's shoulder. "Thank you," He turned his head to kiss Tim's neck, "and maybe when you get back we can continue with that step, if you want."

"Sounds good," Tim smiled and pulled away from Brian to kiss him again. He checked the time and frowned. "I have to go." 

Brian nodded solemnly. "Be safe, please." 

"I will," Tim promised, kissing Brian gently. "I'll see you when I get back." 

"I'll be waiting." 

Brian watched Tim leave the room, mind racing. 

_**Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out, run, run, run, run, run, leave, leave, leave, leave, leave. Just get in the car and leave. Never come back. Leave and start a new life, just the two of us. No murder, no tyranny, no danger, no strain, no sadness, no nightmares.** _

He craved the day he could truly, completely feel at ease again- for the first time in over a decade. It would be so sickeningly _easy_ to escape. He smiled to himself. Soon.

He pushed himself from the bed, throwing on some clothes and heading downstairs. He was greeted by a teenage girl in a smooth white mask wearing a black wig. Her skin was a stark contrast to the accessories: burnt, black, and peeling.

"What's shakin'?" She asked cheerily. "Tim looked very happy earlier, until he realized got paired with Jeff. Not like I blame him either; can't stand that fuckin' dude." 

"Nothing important," he replied, taking a seat on the couch next to her. "What's up with you?" 

"Isn't it obvious?" She motioned to her casual attire, a faded _Guns n' Roses_ t-shirt and black shorts. "I finally got a day off!" 

Brian hummed, and looked longingly at the door, "a day off sounds nice." 

Jane smiled sympathteticly at him. "It must be hard to keep a relationship up, with all this craziness." 

"Yeah," Brian sighed. _But we won't have to deal with that soon._

"I should find somebody," Jane went on. "Need me a gamer girl, to even out all this goth." 

Brian laughed a little, even if he didn't completely understand the joke. Jane stared at him for a moment, and he shivered uncomfortably under the mask's blank expression. 

"What?" 

"What happened?" 

"Nothing happened." 

Jane didn't reply, but Brian could feel her scrutinizing stare. 

"I don't have to tell you anything. I'm, like, twice your age." 

"That doesn't count if I've been 17 for 7 years. You know we don't age here." 

Brian crossed his arms. "I'm serious, Jane, just drop it. It's not important." 

Jane put her hands up, sensing Brian's stress, "alright, alright. Sorry." She got up from couch, hesitating a bit. "I hope whatever it is works out," she said, before retreating into the kitchen. 

"Yeah," Brian sighed to himself. "Me too."


	10. Authors Note

Sorry lads, no update yet! I have been getting a lot of nice comments, though, so I figured I owe you all an explanation for my absence. I've been very busy battling my mental/physical health while also getting my license, finding a job, and being in school. 

I have a million rough drafts for the next chapters (this fic is not dead, the author just is) and I want my updates to be the best for you all. I'm very sorry for the 5 (+?) month long hiatus and I plan on jumping back into writing shortly. 

If you ever want to talk to me you can message me (if you can message on ao3? Idk) or hmu on my tumblr, @demons-against-pedos. Thank you guys so, so much for the support! 

\- Nyx


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